Interesting conversation at church...
Me & my wife were walking in the back after second service today & we were stopped by 2 couples. 1 we knew already & the other we met. We talked about the baby & all the normal hubub that usually gets said in that type of conversation. Then I was asked if I was going to film the birth. I quickly told them I was not & gave a stern look that they even asked. I will be staying away from the business end on the day of reckoning. The husbands gave me their nods of approval. Quickly the conversation took a turn for the interesting. One ladie began telling me about the birth of her first child & how relieved she was that she didn't poop on the table when she gave birth. I was like, "what?" She then informed me that after birthing her second, she said, "what's that smell?" Yep, she pooped on the table & was apologetic to the nurse who obviously didn't think it was a big deal. I thought it was a big deal.
It raised a question in my mind & also gave me a new phrase.
1. Would the nurse be bothered if the husband had sympathy poop? You've heard of sympathy weight, sympathy morning sickness, but why not sympathy poop? The husbands seemed to like this one. Just think the wife pops the baby out & the husband poops his pants...and it's all good. Thanks Helen for the stories...They were..interesting. My wife will be doing a sea salt cleanse the day before the birth. There's no way I'm pooping my pants again.
posted by Murdoc @ 7:58 PM
7 comments
7 Comments:
As soon as I started reading about the video question, I thought to myself, "No way, what if she poops?"
Also, you say that Jessica will partake in a saltwater cleanse the day before the birth; what makes you so positive that the date of birth is set in stone?
Better start that cleanse ASAP.
Ben, I think I laughed for about 3-4 minutes before I could see straight enough to read the letters on my keyboard. Purely fantastic.
I seriously over heard part of your conversation at church, and i was so sad i couldn't jump in on that one! You have to know I have stories. While I am not totally comfortable saying my own, I will share a couple specials. Miss Marie, our resident red-head, passed right out at the birth of my Addison. They have been stangely connected ever since. And not at all related to me- Our friends, Erin and Dan, had a nurse that didn't actually appreciate his comment of "who ordered steak?" as his wife delivered the placenta. Years later, it still cracks me right up.
The OB doc gave me a pair of left-handed, dull-edged preschool scissors, & asked me to cut a garden hose that she claimed was the umbilical cord.
She seemed to really enjoy bringing the proverbial "purple pancake" over, with all 3 kids, for my approval.
Then she'd say, "Oh, look at how HEALTHY the placenta looks. Look at the CONTOURS of the placenta. See how it is WHOLE and COMPLETE it is. This means that there is NO part of the PLACENTA still in the MOMMY."
I've witnessed the birth of all 4 of my children and seen no poop . . .
When my second daughter was born I commented, "It's not too late to have a son . . . just blow really hard on her mouth . . ." The doctor snorted a laugh but the nurse ripped me a new one.
So has this affected your dream of becoming an obstetrician?
I would not be an OBGYN. I will leave that to the other deviants.
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