God told me to...
We went to Chili's last night for dinner. Buffalo Chicken Salad, no pico, extra bleu cheese crumbles & a side of wing sauce=greatness. While waiting for the food, in between conversations, I was watching the College World Series for womens softball. Those girls throw pretty hard. Anyway, while watching I was reminded of someone I knew several years ago who played softball. She was receiving scholarship offers from good D1 schools who wanted her to play, & in return, they would pay for her education. She quit softball. I asked her why, & she informed me that "God told her to quit." It didn't make sense to me then & it still doesn't. I began to process the events from the past with what I believe to be true now. My thought process was something like this:
Why would God tell you to stop doing something: 1. that he's gifted you to do, 2. that you enjoy 3. that would effectively remove you from your interactions/being Jesus to people who don't know him.
To me, it doesn't add up & it's been done by several people I have known personally.
A little different situation- A guy I went to highschool with told me, "God told me to quit soccer." I think the actual situation was that this guy realize his chances of making the team were slim & if he did, he probably wouldn't play much. But what is easier to say? "God told me to quit," or "I'm really not that good & don't want to waste my time trying." It bothers me when people blame it on God.
This can be broadened to situations where people put a God stamp on a decision they're making, when they may actually have good reason for doing what they are. But instead, it's "God told me to do it."
How do you respond to that anyway? Someone who says that, probably isn't going to ask for your opinion. I've found that people will play the God card because it gives no place for input from anyone, it takes away having to talk/think through difficult issues/situations. Pisses me off because people will use the mask of doing something religious to justify their own dysfunctional behavior.
God told me to break up with you?
God told me to move?
God told me to quit?
God told me...are you saying He's wrong?
posted by Murdoc @ 12:14 PM
16 comments
16 Comments:
5 days to deliver on your promise. i see how it is.
you nailed it at the end of your post. people use the "God told me" so that anyone who argues with them is effectively saying that God is wrong. it just gives an insecure person a way to deflect criticism from a sketchy decision.
i think a stock response should be, "that's weird because God just told me that you're wrong."
here's the thing, i hear completely what you are saying and have had several friends who have said this from time to time and just like you mentioned it kinda makes my head tilt as things in thier lives unfold very differently then what they expected, BUT there are times when God does speak and it doesn't always look or sound the way we think it should because His ways don't always make sense so this is a very hard one to determine. this is percisely why i say ,"to each his own" unless they are asking me what i think i don't offer up freely that i think it might just be thier own decisions disguised by God's so called direction.
This is a source of personal hurt to me. Just because someone doesn't understand what God has told us to do or not do doesn't mean that it did not come from God. The sad thing is the people who mock the "God told me to" only do so until God tells THEM something that is unusual or doesn't make sense to others. Can we misinterpret God? Of course, we are human.Thank goodness He is always there to catch us when others aren't.
Brint- Sorry it took 5 days. If you look at the significance of five it will all make sense. 5 is the number of grace. 5 fingers on each hand & five toes on each foot.
Noel- That was a really long sentence. It's a good thing I'm married to someone who speaks woman. She was able to interpret & now I'm good. Thanks:) I also haven't offered my opinion without it being asked of me. At the time, I usually want to give it anyway, but I don't think that it would help things any.
Sherry- Sorry this subject has been a source of hurt. Regarding the people I referenced in my blog, I don't & didn't mock the God told me so. I questioned whether or not God was really the motivator of their decisions. I believe some people take the easy way out by saying "God told me." It is way easier than dealing with tough issues. For example, when i quit my job in Carson, it was hard. 1. I was working for my dad. 2. I had a sweet job that allowed me to do things I enjoyed & it was super flexible. When I quit, it would've been easier to say, God told me to quit, so I'm quitting. Instead, because I respect my dad, I told him what the real reasons were.
I value authenticity, which is probably why it bugs me when I'm confronted with the opposite. Thanks for commenting Sherry.
I can say that I have used the God "card", but it was only when I was forced to. My parents...two people who should know better, kept telling my husband and I that we were crazy for considering a move to Reno-away from family, away from a solid job, away from the city we grew up in. Little did they know God really did tell us so, our family was getting a little tiring and overly unhelpful, mike's solid job had just stopped paying him a paycheck, and the city we grew up in was Vegas...need I say more. For months I kept saying it is what we feel is right for our family. When they all finally told us we were wrong in our choice, we told them it was exactly what God wanted for us. We were pushed into a corner where they were asking us to make sense, but it didn't to us. It only made sense to God. We were okay with that.
ooh. And not to be a horn tooter (snicker..I said tooter.) But there have been plenty of times when God has told me noway Jose to singing. Even though there was plenty of opportunity for me to share Jesus with so many in an industry that really needs it, and even though I feel this is an area God has gifted me, and even though there have been many seemingly great doors of opportunity to be successful. Looking at me now, I see that the only ones who really needed me to share Jesus with them are my little Brewer Beans...five of which never would have been created had I followed Geoerge Dahir's footsteps down the Hollywood road.
Shontell- Imagine where your kids would be without you. For one, Eli wouldn't be nearly as close as he is to being a pastor. As for the others, I'm not really sure where they'd be.
lol. Layla would already be shacked up with a guy-probably Troy Bolton (high school musical), Isabelle would be the most popular rotten thing in the school, and Addison would still be gnawing her little squirrel way through the forest. Sam...well, I can't say for sure. He probably would still be in his egg, never wanting to hatch. I practically had to reach in there and pull him out!!
sheesh, you are right that really was a long sentence. thanks jess for being a good interpreter. i think what you said about wanting to say something but then choosing not to because it probably wouldn't help is where this topic gets a lil hairy because i think that we all from time to time like to tell others what we think they should do with thier lives or how thier decsions that they make will directly affect our lives. the human flesh element comes into play on this one and it's really hard to know when to say something and when not to. this is a topic i could write many a run on sentence for but i will save you the pain and torture. i think a good question to ask is does God tell us to do things that we don't want to or that don't make sense to us and if so for what purpose does He do that?
It's interesting how our decisions effect us. Some have an immediate effect & others we may not see the effect for years down the road.
As for the: does God tell us to do things we don't want to? I say he does. From the Bible alone, we're instructed on how to live, ie, forgiveness & reconciliation, preferring others above ourselves, seeking him first, etc... This kinda stuff doesn't come natural for me & many times I don't want to forgive & seek reconsiliation. I don't know if that's exactly what you were looking for with your question, but that's what came to mind.
The question remains ( in my mind): How do we know when someone else is "taking the easy way out" or displaying "dysfunctional behavior"? We have our opinion but that is all it is, our opinion. I agree with Noel that many times we are concerned with how someone's decision will affect us. If it isn't what we want or like then we tend to not believe that God may be leading them in that decision. Notice I am using "we" because I also can fall into this way of thinking.
I have been in the midst of turmoil (and excitement) due to what God is calling John and I to do/be/begin. I have page after page of written vision and words from the Lord spanning over a 4 year period regarding this subject.But I can be drawn into doubt when and if people around me don't believe that "God told me to". Anyway, thanks for posting on this because it drew me out of a blog shell I put myself in months ago.
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Yep, that was what my questions were aimed at Ben. Sometimes this is where determining what God told us to do can be very tricky because it doesn't seem like something that we would want to do or even something that we think we can do but then I don't think that means it is a sure sign that God is calling you to do something either. Would if you really want to do something AND you feel God is calling you to do it as well but others don't think so. I think of a friend who when she told me she was getting married to this guy and that God told her that everything would work out because even though he was not a follower of Christ like her , he would be someday. Arrghh, what do you say to that? I said I didn't think so ( only because she asked me for my thoughts)and sorry to say several years later , alot of emotional turmoil,and 2 children later she is now divorced.
I think the classic on this one has got to be when a guy or girl is told that they have found thier mate but that other person oblivious of thier existence is caught of guard by , "God told me you were going to be my husband/wife" Would if God is telling one person one thing and another person the exact opposite. I guess this is where the persons track record would come into play. Like I said , I have alot of thoughts on this one.
i think it's a trump card used to throw down any sort of debate or disagreement. myself, i am rather reluctant to pull the "God" card, because if i make a public statement like "God said..or God told me..." then i am making a prophetic declaration, if it doesn't come to pass then i did not hear God correctly (which leads me to question everything i may have thought i heard God say to me in the past as well). i tend to lean toward the understanding that truth is revealed over time and that what i'm experiencing may be just the start of a process, so i view revelations as the beginning and not the final tally, then i have room for personal error and misunderstanding, i can continue in the direction God is leading with the forknowledge that i will inevidably get it wrong most of the time, but if i continue to be obedient where i am then i can be sure i am listening.
To ensure that I'm hearing God correctly, I have put in place some general (not definitive or formulaic) steps:
1. Communicate my thoughts with Mindy, trusted friends, and pastor.
2. Ask for input/opinions/prayers.
3. Constantly ask the Lord for clarity.
4. Give the "hearing" time and due diligence (prudence).
5. Look for provision and opportunities.
6. Submit to sr. pastor if it comes to disagreeing.
7. If not all parties "get it", then I wait for clarity.
8. Sometimes I make mistakes in hearing God. Sometimes I just really want something a lot. It's easy for me to hear what I want to hear. :>)
9. Sometimes I hear correctly from the Lord and mess-up the timing. Don't jump out ahead of the Lord.
These steps were gained insights from past mistakes. The list is not definitive and has room for improvement. The biggest lesson I learned in my last church plant classroom:
***Constantly communicate. Then communicate. And keep communicating with the people I mentioned above. "Hearing" God is a process and it often includes those around us. We're all human and don't get things right away. We must trust that as a group, we will hear God correctly. After all, we all love Jesus with all of our beings***
I didn't want to hijack your blog, so I weighed in on all of this with a post of my own.
cheater tim you are just trying to get all the comments over on your blog :) well, i for one won't fall for that.
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